SIMPLIFY

I have become a believer that as we age, we ever so slowly but ever so surely, begin to crave simplicity.  For example, I'm not even tempted to join the line in order to purchase an iPhone 6.  Why would I want to do that to myself?  I'm happy with my iPhone 5, and feel confident that I still have a lifetime of challenges in the continuing effort to learn everything there is to know about it.

That's one of the reasons I'm mystified that Hillary Clinton may actually run for president in 2016.  She'll be 69 then and have a decent government pension coming in, at least two gorgeous homes to visit, and entre to some of the greatest parties ever given.  I'm not even mentioning that golden-haired grandchild who should be making an entrance anytime now.  Relax, woman!  Simplify.

To that "simplify" end, I spent three sessions on the telephone with COX Communications yesterday in my long-delayed attempt to clean up our COX Cable Bundle.  And, tell me--when did Bundle become a bad word?  It sounded great in 2003, in the headiness that accompanied our purchase of a home in a COX Community.  Yes, Sun City Grand and its homes were pre-wired for anything COX might dream up in the next hundred years or so.  It's all right there in a gray metal box located above each utility room entry.

With high hopes, I called COX mid-morning, signing in with my phone number, the last four digits of my Social and began answering questions designed to place me in a queue of like-minded callers.  In my case, that would be customers planning to discontinue or down-grade their service.  It is not a high-priority queue.

Call #1 lasted 14 minutes and 22 seconds, at which point, the line went dead.  I had been on hold listening to an abbreviated loop of an Andre Segovia classical guitar piece that I really don't think was Andre Segovia.  It was awfully scratchy.  It occurred to me that COX might deal with customers who are planning to discontinue or down-grade their service by simply clicking them off, but I decided to try again about an hour later.  This time I had a fresh cup of coffee, papers to file, and my cell phone on Speaker.

Call #2 required a hold of 61 minutes and 47 seconds.  I know that seems excessive, but I did get quite a bit of filing done, even though the Segovia guitar really got on my nerves, not to mention the 61 reminders of how important my call was to COX.   Finally, Jessica came on the line. She was, I'm afraid, horrified that we didn't watch HBO, craved only "Essential" COX and didn't give a hoot about "On Demand", but maintained her composure and patience and we reached a friendly impasse.  She kept our account and I kept the phone because dropping it would make my bill go up.  I kept Advanced TV with its plethora of useless additional channels, because keeping it meant I didn't have to pay $120 per year for "The Box."  I asked for time to think about it.   

You know what would really simplify our lives?  A la Carte Cable.  That's right--a la carte cable.  Thousands of channels we never watch makes me crazy; I don't even want them there.  Please, call John McCain right now and tell him you want a la carte cable.  I'm not a huge John McCain fan, but he got on that horse once and I was impressed.  Unfortunately, I don't think that horse ever out-ran the cable companies, though. Even with John McCain in the saddle.

Thanks so much for hanging in here...I'm nearly finished. 

Call #3 netted a hold time of 63 minutes, but when she came on the line  Erica really worked:  I will be saving money and clicking through many fewer channels than before.  I still have a land line because Erica worried I might drop a 911 call if I was on my cell phone and  would never be rescued.  It was sweet and not too costly.  We dropped from Premiere to Preferred in one case and Preferred to Essential in another, and it's OK.  Life is still not as simple as I wish it were, but it's a step in the right direction.

A more simple, but happier Margie